Bella Vita

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   The Black Mirror episode “Nosedive” written by Michael Shur and Rashida Jones on Netflix follows a young woman named ‘Lacie.’ She lives in an alternate universe where everyone is given a ‘score’ out of five stars, after each interaction with one another. This score decides the quality of life they live. The deeper meaning behind this Black Mirror episode is Lacie, and her whole societies need for approval from others. It showcases a world where one’s rating directly affects the way people think about themselves and others. In Nosedive, Lacie longs for validation and approval from others. The need to be liked is the underlying aspect of this alternate society, and Lacie’s need to be liked is what fuels her actions throughout the episode. Were the creators of the Black Mirror episode 'Nosedive' able to showcase why people need to be validated?

   In the episode Lacie and every other person in this new world they live in, constantly rate each other on a five-star scale. Their score, that is continuously displayed above their heads, determines their value in society, their access to certain amenities, and their employment status. Lacie’s score is a 4.2, which is respectable, but she envies her childhood friend Naomi, who has a higher rating. Throughout the episode Lacie takes calculated steps to raise her score and eventually be able to live in a more affluent community.

   The reason behind Lacie’s need for a better rating go beyond just the ability to live in a nicer area, but she feels a need to be liked, by everyone. This is shown in the way Lacie acts and composes herself. In Nosedive, Lacie is always seen in pastel and bright colors, her hair is perfectly done, and she always has a smile on her face. She is a complete people pleaser, being extremely friendly to everyone, even if she seems to dislike them. This is all in hopes that she will receive five stars after a short conversation with someone and ultimately feel validated about herself.

   According to Roger Covin’s article “The Need to Be Liked,” he describes this idea as “Human beings’ motivation to receive a positive evaluation from other people.” Covin goes on to say that, “The need to be liked plays a tremendous role in shaping people’s personalities, impacting upon important decisions related to relationships, work and hobbies, causing emotional and behavioral problems, and ultimately influencing our quality of life.” This is significant in relation to Nosedive because Lacie allows her need to be liked to affect every aspect of her life. She finds validation in herself every time she gets a five-star review from someone. The creators of Black Mirror were able to show through Lacie, why the need to be liked strongly affects the way someone carries themselves and interacts with others.

   The act of validation is getting confirmation from others. Confirmation and approval are important to humans because it means what they are doing matters. According to Ilene Cohen’s article, “How to Let Go of the Need for Approval,” she explains that the need for approval stems from one’s need to feel good about themselves. Having confidence is important, but not at the expense of others. The feeling of approval from others is short lived and will only leave people wanting more. Cohen also goes on to say that “There will come a time when the constant seeking – the very solution to our problems – will run its course. And that very behavior that brought us so many feelings of accomplishment will become the problem itself.” The behavior’s that can coincide with constantly needing approval may start off as someone being ambitious but lead to someone becoming despondent. This is clearly shown in Lacie’s character as she begins the episode with high hopes of getting a better score and a great attitude about the whole situation. However, as the episode continues and she happens to receive a couple low ratings, her confidence is seriously damaged. Lacie so heavily relied on others approval, that the thought of someone not liking her is almost debilitating.

In the episode, it is clearly shown that Lacie’s emotions and need to be liked directly contributes to her rating. She is invested in the idea that having more likes makes her a superior person. The creators of Black Mirror were able to show Lacie’s need to be validated stems from her lack of confidence. She puts so much work into raising her score, so others can view her as a ‘five-star’ person because she does not view herself as one.

   The idea of ‘scores’ and ‘ratings’ shown throughout Nosedive is a nod to social media. The concept is closely related to how someone may feel by getting a certain amount of likes or followers on platforms such as Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, etc. Social media is just one way someone may seek validation from others. From Ariel Shensa’s “Social Media Use and Depression and Anxiety Symptoms: A Cluster Analysis,” a study was conducted where they “Identified certain patterns of social media use and associated them with symptoms of depression and anxiety.” The negative effects of needing to be liked and of social media are discussed in this article. Shensa states how, “It’s not just the time spent on social media, but the emotional attachment felt to it that led to these symptoms.” Lacie has a strong emotional attachment to her rating because she believes it reflects her as a person.

This episode shows the damaging effects the ‘score’ can have on one’s confidence. The more invested Lacie gets in raising her ‘score’ the more she almost drives herself over the edge. After receiving a 1-star rating from her brother after an argument, and again from a cab driver she kept waiting, her score drops below a 4.2. Things only escalate when her flight is cancelled, and she can’t book another one because her score is too low. It is at this point in the episode that the consequences of Lacie’s urge to be liked start to show. When she receives these low ratings, she starts to spiral and become frustrated, feeling downgraded, disliked and ultimately like a second- class citizen.

   As shown in the episode, Lacie is taking all these steps to achieve a better rating to live in a wealthier community, with ‘superior’ people. Lacie’s younger brother constantly calls her out on her superficial behaviors, and her doing things just because it is what others are doing. As written in Julianna Duns article, “Examples of Approval Seeking Behavior,” she states, “When we seek others approval, we miss opportunities to learn how to approve of ourselves.” She explains that people who seek approval set themselves up for a life they don’t particularly want but will fit with what others expect of them. People may be afraid to wear something different, be with new friends, and explore new opportunities because they are afraid it may bring on a “disapproving stare" or "ranking low on the social status meter.” Lacie is not an exciting or adventurous person. She follows a strict schedule; everything is organized, and she is always well put together. In the episode, Lacie is seen perfectly biting into a cookie to place next to her coffee for a picture to upload onto her social media. Every picture she takes is particular and precise to ensure a five-star rating on her post. This is her way of presenting herself to the world, everyone in this society wants to seem perfect to others. Lacie believes being this way will ensure her better ratings which in turn, leads her to feel good about herself.

   In Beth Bell’s article “You take fifty photos, delete forty-nine and use one: A qualitative study of adolescent image-sharing practices on social media,” she discusses the psychology behind taking the ‘perfect’ Instagram picture. People want to look as good as possible on their social media’s not only for other people to see but to feel validated about themselves as well. Bell discusses that reaching a certain amount of likes and comments validates that person and boosts their ego. This all plays into the idea of humans need to be liked and praised. Social media continues to be one of the leading ways people seek validation.

 Another reason people may need to be validated is because they are lonely. In Maureen O’ Connor’s article, “Addicted to Likes: How Social Media Feeds our Neediness,” she says, “Social media may be a haven for the lonely – the feedback of acquaintances and strangers, their solace.” People who don’t have a lot of friends and close relationships are able to fill that void with the approval of others. Someone may not need to seek validation if they have a partner or good friends who love them and are there to instill confidence in them. Unfortunately, Lacie seems to have no one to confide in and make her feel good about herself. Instead she seeks approval from others and relies on her score to validate herself.

   Getting to the bottom of why someone needs approval, may help them understand where their feelings are coming from. According to Linda Sapadin’s article, “Importance of Seeking Validation,” she explains that comprehending why someone may need approval can help them eliminate the behavior altogether. She states, “People seek approval because their uncertain, or if they are certain they want people to accept them.” Sapadin says, “Before you turn to others for approval, stop and ask yourself “What do I think about this?” She discusses why people trust other opinions more than their own. Her idea is that if people held their thoughts and beliefs in a higher regard than others, this notion of needing to be validated could be eliminated.

   There are many similarities between Black Mirror’s dystopian society and society today. In a world filled with technology, the most effective way young people seek validation is through social media platforms. Although, some may say that there is may be no urge for validation if surrounded by a positive school environment and with strong parental guidance. In the article titled, “I don’t need people to tell me I’m pretty on social media,” written by Blair Burnette, Melissa Kwitowski and Susan Mazzeo, a study was conducted surveying girls from an all-girl school in the 7th and 8th grade. They studied their social media use and how it affects their body image and confidence in themselves. The study showed that many of the girl’s social media use was either monitored or restricted by their parents, they believe this is one of the reasons girls were less likely to give in to the idea that they need to be liked by everyone.

   The girls in the survey were described from Blair, Kwitowski and Mazzeo as “Having high media literacy, and appreciation of diversity, and confidence.” The authors Blair, Kwitowski, and Mazzeo state that “The supportive culture of the school, evident in the attitudes and messages that teachers and administrators promote, evoke confidence and body positivity in their students.” This shows that parents who are involved in their kids’ life and put their kids in a positive environment are able to influence their thoughts and feelings about themselves. If young girls are educated about the consequences of comparing themselves to others and are given ways to feel confident in themselves, they can avoid the heartbreak and mental issues that come with constantly needing to be validated.

   On the other hand, going to a school with boys and girls that have hundreds of kids, it can be hard to help and understand what every student is going through. Not everyone has parents or teachers who instill these ideas of confidence, diversity and body positivity in them. If they are not in the best environment, they may find themselves looking to others for validation. According to Xianhui Wang, from his article “Exploring the Influence of Parental Involvement and Socioeconomic Status on Teen Digital Citizenship,” he states that, “Parents are the child’s first and most influential teachers of civic values and attitudes.” Having an influential figure is important to help young people understand why needing approval from others is not necessary, and especially on social platforms. Wang goes on to say that, “Unfortunately, 72% of parents of online teens are unaware of what their child posts on social media and how they interact with others.” This is why it is difficult for young people to not take social media very seriously. Unlike the girls in the previous survey who felt confident in themselves without justification from others, most students aren’t being observed and monitored by their parents. Many teens believe being liked is essential to every aspect of going through school.

   There are many consequences that come with the concept of validation. People often lose their true self-seeking approval from others. They find themselves doing things, not because they want to but because it is what seems ‘cool’ and what others are doing. Although it may seem there is no way to escape the constant fear of what others are thinking, there are steps to make sure one’s happiness does not rely on others. From Gura, Shira’s article, “Steps to self-worth,” he states, “The first step to stop seeking approval of others is to become aware that we are stuck on doubt, insecurity and uncertainty. We must recognize that our actions (of seeking approval) comes from the emotions and beliefs that arise within us.” Having a strong sense of self-worth, set of beliefs and acceptance of others allows people to not only need to seek validation, but not incline them to validate others.

The ‘Nosedive’ episode of Black Mirror presents a world where, who someone can be friends with, where they can go and where they can live, all depends on their rating out of five-stars. The rating is just a way the people in this society seek approval from others. The need to be liked is essential to these characters in Nosedive. Getting five-stars allows them to feel good about themselves, like they accomplished something.

   Like Lacie, many people become consumed in how others think of them because it makes them feel good about themselves. Feeling validated is about believing in one’s self. Confidence is attractive, it brings success and helps someone to better interact with others. The need to be liked can affect people in many different ways, it can consume someone’s thoughts and actions. The concepts that were lacking in this society is ideals of self-worth, and acceptance. Those two things allow someone to feel good about themselves without the opinion of others. If Lacie was able to find worth in herself apart from others, she wouldn’t have cared about her score and gone to extreme means to raise it. Black Mirror Nosedive exposes humans extreme need for validation, it shows how people feel when they do get that seal of approval from others, and how they spiral when some people simply, just don’t like them.